How they won with only 38% possession and nearly zero shots of any kind I’ll never know. We’re still going to win the league for the simple reason that ours is the best team in it. Perhaps Joe Hart should change from ‘Head and Shoulders’ to ‘Cock and Balls’ and learn to keep his legs shut. But that goal of Yaya’s, pure class and class is permanent. We’ll still be Champs.

Sunderland. Are black cats a portent of ill fortune or good? A witch’s familiar? Black Cats to cop for it now on Boxing Day I feel where the only thing familiar will be the familiar goalkeeper stooping to pick the ball out of the back of his net.

Omens. I’ll be visiting B&Q in the sales for a new shed, I’ve now more clothes pegs than Appleby Horse Fair.