Last ball out of the bag again to get the trip we just can’t make. If Twatter and Prattini hadn’t been under careful scrutiny I’d have been shouting “Fix!” It’ll be freezing anyway, better going to the following game somewhere in a Spring we can recognise and we can save our hard-earned until then too.

OK we winged it against Swansea. But there you are, we provide such excitement even when we’re playing poorly yet again pulling out the irons late on. I actually heard some City fans declaring that the Swans were unlucky and deserved to get something out of the game. Well they did they got a bloody good lesson, and the fans with their webbed feet can now sod off back to Wales even more quickly in that deluge they brought with them.

Don’t anybody ever make the mistake of calling me fair or impartial. Prejudice runs through my sky-blue veins and I love the feeling.

Deluge. I was told that I was fashioned out of a piece of Noah’s ark. I reckon it was from the cubit under the dung heap, whatever a cubit is. I know what a dung heap is having spent too many years in the swamp of Old Trafford.